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Stop Hating On the Confidence

I always advocate for self-confidence and body positivity because I know how important it is for people to find love for themselves. There’s nothing sadder than believing you have to ask others for permission to love yourself. I see so many people do this and when they don’t get the recognition they seek, they fall into depression. I have been in that place myself and I know just how easy it is to fall into the habit of looking to others for the approval that you can’t find within yourself.

What’s crazier is that people actually want you to seek their permission to love yourself! Have you ever noticed how people want someone who is confident, but also want them to seek their permission to be confident? They want someone who loves themselves, but they put people down if they don’t fit their criteria. People want you to look a certain kind of way, dress a certain kind of way, or live a certain kind of way in order to gain their approval. I refuse to do it and so should you. You don’t need anyone to tell you that it’s okay to love yourself.

I have seen men and women alike post a picture of themselves and take the picture down because of comments that were negative. Sometimes the comments came from total strangers and sometimes they came from people that they know. When they uploaded the picture they loved it but it only took a matter of minutes for them to lose that confidence. It’s extremely easy to sit behind a keyboard and talk badly about others, especially when you don’t even like yourself. Social media has led to what I call “troll culture”. These people make it a point to troll others and make people feel bad about themselves but guess what? Not anymore.

Take your power back! Take your confidence back! Take your self-love back! Tell the trolls to STOP HATING ON THE CONFIDENCE and find some. You weren’t put on this earth to be judged by the people around you, especially if that judgement is making you unhappy. I want people to see that I have stretch marks. I want them to see that I have fat. I want them to see that my hair is kinky. I want them to see my eczema and acne scars. I WANT PEOPLE TO SEE ME!

The reason for that is, I want others to embrace who they are without worrying about what everyone thinks. I know it’s not easy but trust me it is so worth it. You will see a lot of differences in the way that you think and act. That shirt you didn’t think you could wear? You’ll wear it. Those shoes you thought you were too tall for? You’ll wear them. The outfit you’ve put off wearing because you didn’t think you could pull it off? You will rock it and dare a hater to hate.

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I talk more on this subject in my podcast Stop Hating On the Confidence. Be sure to listen and let me know what you think. Also, don’t forget to comment, like, share, and follow!

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Team Natural

I always want people to see me in the most authentic way possible. I feel like it’s important because there are so many people quick to put out false representations of themselves in order to impress others. None of us are perfect but that’s okay! You don’t have to be. This is something I had a hard time figuring out the first time I went natural. It’s not easy to embrace things that people usually tell you are not attractive. That’s how I felt about my hair.

I can’t help the type of hair that grows out of my head but I used to hate the way it looked. Ridiculous right?! I wanted to have the loose curly hair that everyone deemed “good hair”. I didn’t like the idea of having kinkier hair. Looking back, I see how important it is to learn how to love things before letting others color your perception of it. I had already convinced myself that I should not like my hair because of what other people thought and oh how wrong I was.

Our hair is unique to us, and that uniqueness should be embraced. One thing I learned was that despite everyone having similar curl patterns and textures, no one’s hair is exactly the same. Different parts of my hair are literally different curl patterns AND textures! The back my hair is around a 4b curl pattern and the front is more of a 4c curl pattern. For those of you who don’t know what that means, see the chart below:

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The texture of my hair lies somewhere between type 6 and 7:

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Loving your hair is a journey, and not an easy one at that. I think everyone should figure what works best for them and learn to embrace what makes them happy. I’m team natural because I WANT TO BE but if you aren’t, do you hun! What matters most is that: 1. Your hair is healthy

2. You love it!

To hear me talk more about this topic, listen to my podcast called Hair: If You Like It I Love It. I talk a little more about my natural hair journey and experience. Let me know what you think. Also, don’t forget to comment, like, share, and follow.

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Vitaminkey93

So today I decided to take a leap of faith and put one of the t-shirt designs I’ve been working on up for sale. I have been holding off, convincing myself not to do it for so long for so many reasons. How many people do you see selling t-shirt? Tons right! That’s why I was afraid to do it, but fear is all a part of chasing your dreams.

I’m sure it’s something you’ve wanted to do, but have been afraid to do. You’ve probably done the same thing I have. You’ve decided that there are a lot of people out there doing the same thing and you’ve convinced yourself that there is no point in doing it. Oh but you would be wrong. Why? It’s because there is only one you. No one can take away from the fact that there are some things that are better because you are the one that’s doing it.

I’m done talking myself out of it and there’s no reason I shouldn’t pursue my dreams. As I tread unknown waters I pray that you are willing to help me get closer to my dreams. Below is a link to teespring.com where you can purchase one of my Better Not Bitter t-shirt for Vitaminkey93. Thank you so much for any and all support. I hope that you also start to embrace your dreams.

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What Happened? Social Media

When did we start letting social media control who we are? When did it start being about everyone but us?

I remember a time when we could be ourselves on social media: When being ourselves was the whole point. Now it’s turned into a sort of competition. Everyone wants to seem like they are living the best life even when they aren’t. It’s become a breeding ground for people who have either become narcissistic or depressed. There is a false sense of security with being popular online that many have become accustomed to.

Remember when we were just content with being in someone’s top friends on Myspace? Remember when we were just exited to meet other people our age from another school? Remember when we were just happy to have a way to connect with family and friends we never get to see? Now we’re more concerned about what Karen from finance thinks about our outfit. It’s not fair. We need to take it back. We need to learn how to embrace ourselves without being fearful of what everyone else might think.

For some, trolling is a full time job. They enjoy trying to make other people feel miserable. They hide behind fake google images and random images so that they can bully other people online. Why do they have so much power? It’s because we’ve given it to them. I’ve been called fat, unattractive, been told I need to lose weight, and it will probably only get worse in the future. Why? Because trolls will always exist as long as social media (actually the internet) exists. I’ve learned to tune it out and show them that I won’t be defeated by their words. I spent enough time tearing myself down, I’m not about to let others do the same.

Below is from my recent podcast where I talk a little more about this topic. Give it a listen and let me know what you think. Be sure to like, comment, share, and follow me while you’re at it.

Thanks for reading and thanks for listening!!

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The Dark Cloud of Depression

🚨New Post Alert🚨

This is from an episode of my podcast Vitamin Key is called:

The Dark Cloud of Depression

I talk a little about my thoughts on depression, people’s perception of it, and my own experience with it. It’s not an easy thing to tell people you deal with for fear of being judged, but I think it’s important that we talk about it more if people are to start being able to deal with it.

When people think about depression they usually think about the commercials. Not the actual experience of being in a state of depression. Let’s be honest: most people don’t understand it and many don’t take the time to. It makes them uncomfortable and it’s not easy to help someone who has it. I talk a little about this in my podcast. Take a listen. Let me know what you think, and let’s talk about it.